God how I wish I could blog about work. Granted, there is nothing that physically prohibits me from doing so, but my stupid fucking better judgment always kicks in and tells me it's just a hideously bad idea. But it really is a shame, y'all would get a kick out of the shit that runs through my head about that place and the goings on there. Too bad. You'll never know. Well, maybe one day you will, but until then I guess you're stuck with other random shit that runs through my crazy bleach blonde head.
So today, daughter #1 took the flubbery beast for his daily walk because I didn't have time to do it over lunch and I was afraid it would be raining by the time I got home from work. (I still haven't seen the aforementioned rain which I thought was in the forecast, but whatever - it's May - in Kansas - just go with it). So, the point of that long drug out explanation is this: I TOOK MY DAILY WALK WITHOUT THE FAT ASS DOG IN TOW!! I got to walk alone. - Just myself. Without having to maneuver a 110 lb dog, without having to deal with every "watch dog" in the neighborhood nipping at my heels and without having to drag him away from every hydrant he insists on planting his nose into. It was quite blissful - almost to the point I felt guilty for enjoying myself so much. He so enjoys the little jaunts we go on, so I felt horrible that I was enjoying myself more without him. I got over it pretty quick though. I'm pretty damned good at finding reasons for feeling guilty and I quickly dismissed the guilt related to a dog. Plenty of people out there to spend that energy on.
Good GOD - get a grip here - I cannot carry a fluid thought for more than 2 minutes people. Maybe it's because I'm also trying to watch the Real Housewives of NYC and the drama is pretty intense and, like it's a train wreck, I cannot turn away. Those bitches are fucking NUTS. And also, the husband came in to tell me a long story about something and someone and all I know is that it involved pot. I'll have to ask him more about that later.
So anyway, while I was walking - ALONE - it occurred to me that I was keeping pace with the music blaring from my iPod into my ears and not the dog like I normally am. And it was kind of a slow song, so it was taking me a horribly long time to traverse the OH FOR THE LOVE OF CHRIST. NOW DAUGHTER #2 WANTS ME TO WATCH HER PUT ON HER PAJAMA TOP.
Think. Think. Think. Just never fucking mind. It wasn't that interesting or funny anyway.