Monday, May 10, 2010

Graduation List

I know, I know.  Y'all are SICK of hearing about graduation.  Too bad.  Go to the next blog if you don't want to read about it anymore.  But - this is my list of shit to get done before graduation.  I thought I'd share it now and then share an updated list with you as the day gets nearer just so you can also see how fucking hilarious it is that I even made the damned list to begin with.


Notice:  there are only 2 items crossed off the list.  They both deal with plants.  (lipstick on the pig) and neither are relevant to the actual task at hand.  But, I got them done!!!  Okay - I lied.  One of them "got done" because the husband gave me a plant flower thingamabop for Mother's Day.  Yes.  I'm that fucking lame.  I totally tried to lie and say I actually accomplished TWO items on the list when in fact I did not.  Get the fuck over it.  I have. 

But I love this list.  Some of it is so fucking critical to the whole success of the graduation and celebration of this moment. 
  • Buy new hand towels
  • Paint toenails!
  • Make a list of shit to buy at Sam's Club (classic - an item on one list is to make another list)
  • Dust
This shit is important.  Then there's the other shit on the list - you know - the filler - the shit that is there for placeholder value only to make me look like I've really busted my ass in preparation of the whole thing.  Shit like:
  • Order a cake
  • Talk to brother about the food
  • Finish picture board
  • Graduation Card
I mean seriously?  Is that shit even important?  Oh, and here's a classic item on the list:  Pay RE taxes.  REALLY?  What.the.Fuck do real estate taxes have to do with graduation?  I don't even know why that's on the fucking list.  I should just cross it off and forget it.  And my personal favorite and the one I'm looking forward to the ABSOLUTE most:  MAKE 10 LBS OF POTATO SALAD.  Fuck.  My arm already hurts just thinking of having to stir that shit. 

I'll update you later on how I've progressed through the list.  In the meantime, I've got to make a list of shit to buy at Sam's Club....

1 comment:

  1. Sam said my arms are getting flabby. Do you need help stirring that potato salad?

    ReplyDelete